Getting Closer….

Well, I am officially in the 3rd trimester in my 31st week and getting bigger and bigger each week!  We are getting really excited!

I am feeling apprehensive though….just about the standard things like parenting, money and added responsibilities.  I am feeling anxious too….about meeting him.  What will he look like?  What kind of personality will he have?  What will he sound like?  Just thinking about him in detail like that makes me tear up.  I can’t wait.  I keep freaking myself out though, by reminding myself (and Jon) that our lives are about to change drastically and FOREVER in just a couple of months!  I don’t know if this is a normal feeling, but sometimes I feel sad about that.  It won’t be just me and Jon ever again.  We’ll never be able to just take off to the store or anywhere on a whim…car seats, stroller, diaper bags, CHILD and etc. will all have to soon be considered and taken along.  Which then reminds me that we need a bigger vehicle!  Ahh  It can feel very overwhelming, but this is a dream I have always had…to have a family…and a big one!  So, I hope that I can handle just this one!

We have his room getting closer to being in order.  We have the furniture and his CAMO bedding all in there looking awesome!  The camo bedding is so cute and is military style versus hunting camo.  Jon has a few patches that his Uncle Dan gave him from his time serving in Desert Storm and we hope to find a cool way to incorporate those in Jackson’s room.  Also, Jon has some of his old G I Joes that we can display in there, so his room should look cool and manly! I’ll have to post a picture once it’s done.

Count down starting!  at least for me…..

so….

We are having a boy!  I can’t hardly believe it.  Knowing it’s a him and imagining what he may be like and look like, helps to really sink it in that Jon and I are going to be parents and have a family.  Just thinking about a whole new personality in our home and the new dynamic that will come along with this addition is really intimidating.  I feel nervous, like going on a first date nervous.  I know that sounds weird, but maybe I’m talking about my first date with Jon.  Knowing that I already loved him, but not know what would happen or what to expect.  Very exciting stuff!  I can feel the little man kicking, punching and moving around finally!  It is the most bizarre feeling ever, but I love it!  One night, just relaxing and watching TV, he shifted around big time.  Jon happened to be resting his hand on my belly and we both felt it and freaked out!  I think it is becoming very real to both of us, but especially my hubby.  Feeling our son move inside of me, I think, helped Jon connect to him in a way that I don’t think he was expecting.  We are at the half way point, me being 20 weeks going on 21 weeks this Sunday.  He’ll be here in 5 months and I feel completely unprepared.  Hopefully I can get a lot done in those quick 5 months!  Bitter-sweetly, we are getting new carpet soon.  Our house flooded on Saturday…but just enough to ruin the floors and not any sheet rock!  Praise God!  So, we are having to replace the 20 year old, pee stained, stinky, carpet…bummer.  ;^)  While we have beautiful cement floor, we are getting all the painting, we never got around to, done, so we won’t have to worry about dripping on the new carpet.  I am SOOOO happy about that.  But, it could not be getting done without the help of my parents and the volunteer helpers they brought along!  Thanks folks!  I can’t wait to get our home back in order, so I can start getting the baby room ready…slowly!

By the way…I’m pretty sure we are going to name our son Jackson Cash Randolph.   I can’t wait to meet him!

Finally!

I think I am finally out of the first trimester! I haven’t been miserably tired in a few days, so I have hope!!! I have heard that the second trimester is the best and most fun, so I am excited. Not to mention, we will learn if we are having a boy or girl in about a month! I’ll be glad to know, because I can start trying to decorate the room and buy things that aren’t yellow! Not that I have, but we didn’t want to wait until the birth to find out because, we wanted to be able to pick a name more easily and be able to decorate in gender specific colors! I also, can’t wait to start showing…none of that yet. And to feel the baby move or kick or something! I think that will be what sinks it in that this whole ‘we’re having a baby’ thing is real.

Thursday’s Thoughts

So, I decided to have the baby at Texas Women’s Hospital.  I would prefer to have a water birth, but the place that I wanted to do it at was in the Woodlands…too far for peace of mind!  So, I am going to go to the OB that Mikah just used for Max’s birth.  At my appointment yesterday, they told me I am due September 6th.  Just one day later then the first place I went.  So, I am going to go by that date, since I am going to stay there.  By my next appointment, in a month, I will already be 12 weeks, or 3 months for those who don’t like to count weeks like me!  I will be beginning my second trimester!  That’s crazy to me.  But awesome!

Another cool fact is, the baby is 19mm long (crown to rump)…basically 2cm long!  Tiny, tiny thing.  I cant wait to get the “big” ultrasound and see the baby actually looking like a baby and not a blob!  Plus, finding out if it is a boy or girl!  I’m having trouble with what pronoun to use!  For now I have just been saying baby…not THE baby…just baby.   I can’t wait for baby to get here!  haha

AAAHHHH!

It’s official!  I am 7 weeks and 4 days pregnant!  My due date is September 5, 2009! Yay!  I have been 1% worrying that I wasn’t really pregnant, even though I knew I was!  Well, I can’t do that now!  My husband, my mommy, and I got to see the baby on the ultra sound today.  Soooo weird….I am randomly freaking out still.  Trying to come to terms with the fact that I really am pregnant and we are really going to have a baby and all the responsibilities that ensue!  But, I guess that’s why God gives us emotional women 9 months to get used to the idea of a forever different life.  Thank you God and hallelujah for this whole process and for the many blessings you have given us!

7 weeks 4 days

7 weeks 4 days

Today’s the day!

Today I go to my first doctor’s appointment!  Hopefully, the doctor will be able to tell how far along I am.  I have been dying to know!  I want to be able to look at all the week-by-week pictures out there and see which one is for me!  I will definitely post again once I find out….prayers are welcome!

On the birthing center….

I really liked the Nurse-Midwife there, but the facilities left something to be desired.  It just looked like she knew what she was doing and was trying to do the best possible with the money she had.  She did say she has a vision (from God) that she is supposed to open a 10,000 sq. ft. building one day, so that is cool.  However, there are a couple of other places I want to tour.  One is in Pasadena on Strawberry street and the other is in the Woodlands.  The one in the Woodlands looks the best and nicest, but it is the farthest, so that is something to consider and ask about when we go.  I also, want to meet Dr. Abbott, who is the doctor I would end up with, so I can see if I just might like her the best!  I am seeing Dr. Falk today, basically, just to get in the office as a new patient.  Dr. Abbott, was full to see new patients until mid-late February, so the front desk lady helped me get in to a different doctor so that I could get in with Dr. Abbott a lot sooner.  She was really helpful.

Well, I will let y’all know how it all goes!

Friday Feelings

I’ve been able to eat regularly since my last post…no nausea since either!  Thank God!  The more I think about what is happening to us, the more I start to freak out.  I think about how I am going to be responsible for a real human being.  And how I will be responsible for what kind of a person they will be when they grow up.  What pressure.  We will have to raise this person in a way that insures that they will be Godly, responsible, mature and considerate when grown.  I believe I know how to reach this goal in my head, but to actually do it is what scares me.  There are so many things I could to do screw them up forever and I don’t want that to happen.  My mind has begun to change…for the better.  I am now thinking about what is best to do for this human that had no choice in being here or who it’s parents are.  I hope I don’t disappoint.  I just want to be as healthy as possible, because then baby will be healthy.  I don’t want to do anything to my body that might affect my baby.  (Has anyone else freaked out like this?)  And that includes labour.  I’ve been researching what is the best option for me and the baby during that time in our lives…since way before I was even pregnant!  What seems to stick in my mind is to have a water birth.  I know most of people will be freaked out, turned off, or anxious when they first hear this.  I have already come up against some resistance and hesitance for considering this.  But, just because it is not what our society has taught us to be the right way doesn’t mean it is wrong or bad.  There is a place in Pearland, about 20 minutes from where we live, that is having an open house from 10am to 3pm and we are going to go, so that we can ask a million questions and see what it is all about.  From the research that I have done, I have gathered that this is the safest choice for me and my baby.  And for me…that is all I can think about.  Feel free to ask me about it if you are curious.  I am not an expert, but I have read quite a lot of things about it.  I will let y’all know how it goes tomorrow!

FOOD!

I can eat it now!  No throwing up today…as of now…and no queasiness!  Hallelujah!  I had dinner with my Daddy last night and I was able to eat a whole meal and nothing made me feel sick!  I felt SO much better after getting some much needed food in my stomach.  So, what will I be able to eat today?….

My first appointment will be on Tues. Jan. 20th.  Hopefully I will find out how far along I am!

Never the same…

Saturday, after almost a week of constantly sore breasts, I asked my dear husband (DH) to go ahead and buy yet another pregnancy test. Just in case. We have experienced many blanks on these over the past year. Since, I haven’t been having regular periods for a little over a year, I was expecting another negative result. But…at 7:30-something on Sunday morning, I took a test with my first pee of the day, the most concentrated. As I lay back down for my 3 minute wait, I wanted to just go to sleep again. Luckily, I didn’t sleep through the life changing news! I asked Jon what time it was and it was time! I walked over, in the dark, and peeked at the window, looking for a white blank area. And to my ’shock’, I thought I saw a line. I stepped closer and peered down and sure enough, a line! I’m pregnant?!?! Covering my mouth in surprise, and I think gasping, Jon said, “What? You are?!”, with hesitant excitement. So, I nodded the news to him, making it a little more real. He popped out of bed a we both looked at it in awe then hugged. I quickly started to freak out, but told myself and my DH that I still should take the second one to make sure. So, we laid in bed pondering if it was true what would soon be happening in our lives. Meanwhile I was drinking water to try and pee again, so I could try to pass the second test. We have been wanting this for so long to no avail, that I was very hesitant to get excited. Finally, my bladder was ready for the second go ’round. Another test peed on, another excruciating 3 minutes gone by and it was time for our confirmation or contradiction. We both hustled over and BAM! another line! That’s when we could really be happy and really start freaking out. Then I puked. My first one! haha It had to be the nerves. We laid back in bed and I half thought I could go back to sleep, but yeah right. We we’re awake for the day! We took a picture of the two tests side-by-side which gave DH the idea to give them to our folks and his sister in fake cards that would spill the news…no waiting 3 months for us! So, eventually, we got up and dressed and headed to CVS to pick out the right card for each person and printed the pics of the tests. We hit my parents first. Being first time grandparents, we knew that the ‘birthday’ cards that said grandma and grandpa on the front would quickly give it away. My dad, Matt, opened his first and slyly peered over at me with a hint of a smile, but knowing that my mom, Laurie, hadn’t opened her’s yet, he didn’t say anything to ruin her surprise. As she opened her card, a look of confusion and hesitant elation came over her beautiful face. I will never forget their faces. She asked if I was pregnant and we all got to hug in excitement when I said yes! After we left there we caught my sister-in-law, brother-in-law, niece and nephew at home. Sister Cindy, soon to be Auntie Cindy, opened her card and immediately screamed her joy! then huge hugs followed by their clan of four. They fed us dinner as we discussed things to come, then it was time to go see DH’s parents. Father-in-law Richard knew right away after opening the card and mother-in-law Linda slowly processed the surprising, yet much anticipated, news and then began to bawl her bliss for a good few minutes. Going from hugging me to her son, back and forth, back and forth, she repeated how happy she was. After more hugging with the in-laws and reassurance that they will be there for whatever we may need, we headed home for some much needed rest. Little did I know that I would be waking up to throw-up again. And again today. So, i guess it is really real…I never throw-up, unless I have the flu or something to that effect. I am definitely hating the constant nausea and morning time bile throw-up, but I am also, thankful for it, because I know for sure that I am going to have a baby! I just have to power through it and tell my baby to quit making me sick! More to come…

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